Cody Updates by Mom

As I have been thinking throughout this week, it has been hard to focus on things with everything else going on.  As I see so many differing posts on the recent celebrity deaths and the issues in other countries it is easy for me to not want to write.  It is easy to start to think that things just really aren’t that bad and why is my situation anything special that people would want to connect to.  As a society we have a habit of constantly comparing our issues to others.  Either our issues are small or big comparatively.  I found myself comparing my situation and finding myself falling short.  Granted, it is humbling to think of how small we are compared to the world but if we continue to do this we may lose the self worth that I believe we should have.

As I have moved through this I found that it is important to me to continue to help others with the knowledge of what happens when you are going through the phases to cure or stop cancer from returning.  With radiation being daily I get to experience cancer situations on a daily basis.  Every day I go to radiation I see the same group of people.  They have the same timeframes that I do for their treatments.  There is one man that always makes the girls laugh, there are the people that I can tell are just trying to make it through all the rough spots and then there are those that may be in a dark place.  I see them daily and wonder what they see in me.  I greet my radiation therapist with a smile and try to make them laugh.  I cannot imagine their job but am grateful that they are so open to talking and making me feel important in their day.  I hope they see me as a person that has beaten this disease and risen above.  I hope my smile and “hello” give them at least a little light in a hard day.

Tomorrow is miracle treat day for the company I work for.  Yep, DQ.  Tomorrow the majority of our stores in north America will donate money to their local CMN hospitals.  I like this day because I know that the kids in these hospitals need our help and so do their families.  I am again humbled at the kids that have to deal with situations that are unfair and their families that have to somehow cope with such hard times.  I raise my blizzard in honor of these amazing kids that keep fighting every day.  You are truly an inspiration to all.  You should be the focus of news feeds every day!

In honor of the fight against any illness I wanted to share with you the top things I am thankful for.  Please note this is truly a personal list. 🙂

1. I am thankful for my home support team.  I would not be anywhere without having my family supporting me.  Jim has been great in helping, being silly and consoling me even if it seems impossible.  Cody has been great at being such a caring son and continuing down the path of being a normal teenager which is good to keep me grounded.  Even though Alex and Phil are not here daily, their texts, calls and visits are so very nice to help me forget me and think about their accomplishments.

2. I am thankful for my extended family and friends.  Your supportive calls, letters, cards, texts and posts are so very helpful to me to think positive.  You just being there is a help to my daily well being.  I wish I had enough time to see you more but I am blessed to have you in my life.

3. I am thankful for my coworkers.  I am lucky to work in a department at DQ that is not only very caring but also sarcastic.  There are days that I need a hug and days that I need to laugh.  Sometimes it is in the same day that I need both.  I seem to be able to always find either when I need it.  They are also so supportive of what I am going through.  I can be tired and maybe a little crabby and they are still ok with me.

4. I am thankful for scarves.  I have never been a scarf person in the past but boy have I jumped on the bandwagon.  They are a comfortable option to cover the head and once I can find matching clothes I am very happy.

5. I am thankful for fake hair.  I have learned that I cannot afford a real hair wig.  (Holy mackerel they are spendy)  I now have three new wigs and I am excited to have a different look without having to match a color of a scarf.  There is simplicity in hair. 🙂  However, I have to be careful where I wear the blonde wig because if I get carded it could be an awkward situation.

6. I am thankful for different colored M&M’s.  You would not believe how comforting it is to gather your M&M’s into piles of like colors and then eat them according to color.  Ok,  I might be a little weird but I am sure you will try it soon.  Hee hee.

7.  I am thankful that there is still a light at the end of the tunnel.  I know that it has been a long road and sometimes the end seems to move farther away but all the while I have still been able to see it.  It reminds me of the hope that my future holds and keeps me moving forward.

8. I am thankful that I had the reconstruction surgery before radiation.  I basically have a very bad burn in places that cause significant discomfort.  The fact that I had the surgery means that I can actually get away with no bra.  I know you guys are dying on the inside but too bad.  Trust me, this is something to be very thankful for.  I am happy that I have been able to reduce the amount of items that are causing discomfort to an area that is already uncomfortable. 🙂  Yay me!!!

9. I am thankful that I have not lost my sense of humor.  Laughter is so very important to healing and I am happy that I have not lost the ability to laugh at life and even myself.  I hope all of you find something amazing to laugh at today and can feel your soul smiling on the inside while you do.

10. I am thankful for ice cold beer.  Not explanation needed.

So, how am I doing?  Well, I am pretty tired.  Chemo had really bad days and then also good days.  Radiation is a constant fatigue and a continual increase in burning.  It is not as bad as chemo but not great either.  I fight each day to reach above the fatigue.  Some days are easier than others but I find it harder after each treatment.  As I go, the burning on the skin gets worse and it is getting more painful and itchy.  Again, not horrible but not great.  I continue to moisturize and use the anti-itch cream.  I am thinking they will have to give me the super-prescription-strength anti-itch cream this week.  Kind of nice to know that another option is there.  I am at treatment 19 tomorrow.  Only 14 more to go after.  Way over the 50% mark!!  🙂  Looking forward to my last day – 9/4!  Now I just need the “I’m Finally Done” party.

The Tamoxifen (anti-estrogen) drug is causing a bit of issues.  I have dealt with some nausea and diarrhea issues.  I got some advice from the oncologist on things to try to decrease these and so far have had pretty good luck.  I am thinking that we should be able to minimize the side effects and continue on the medication to reduce the recurrence.

Overall, I am doing ok.  I am able to work and get through my days.  I am focused on getting through the radiation with as much strength as possible.  I remind myself that I am not alone and it helps me to keep one foot in front of the other.

I wish you a wonderful week of laughter, blizzards and hope.

Caring Bridge Comments

Lorelie|Aug 15, 2014 1:49pm
You continue to amaze me with your positive attitude. Keep up the good fight, young lady! I’ll see you soon to give you that well-deserved hug!