Cody Updates by Mom

Hello.  So, last week I had surgery again.  I know, I really didn’t let too many people know.  Due to many other circumstances it fell to the bottom of important things going on.  It was some minor surgery for my breast reconstruction.  Due to the radiation on the left and the change it made to my skin we are having to do a lot of work to get me to look normal.  Thank you so much to my niece Kate for being the best date a girl can have at 5:30 am for a little work done on the girls.  It was such a treat to spend time with you!  The only downfall of the surgery was the drain that I had to have for the week after.  I know they are a necessity but really, do they have to pretend to be sharp knives that are being stabbed into my side??  Thankfully the drain came with pain meds.  I got the drain out on Wednesday so only had to have it for the week.  I am healing as I should.  I still have at least one more surgery and we are hoping to have that before the end of the year.  On a positive note, I am ten weeks out from my last dilation, yay!  Eating is going as it should. 🙂

There are so many storms roiling around the people in my life that my stuff has really not been all that important to me.  Your storms are so strong that I just couldn’t even worry about my own.  Mine are a simple scattered shower.  I haven’t written about me due to the fact that I cannot get out of my mind what those around me are dealing with.  I have decided to share with you some of their storms.  I send prayers for anyone that is in the midst of their storm.

My brother’s surgery has not been as smooth as mine.  I wish I could magically make the food agree with your system and you would be able to eat normal.  I know you will get through it but I wish I could save you the stress, frustration and pain you are enduring.  I am here if you need.  Know that I send my positive thoughts your way regularly.

Tonight we took my mother in law out for her birthday.  She is 85 and is getting close to the late stage of Alzheimer’s.  It is such a horrible disease.  I help as much as I can to take the full burden of her care off of Jim but I cannot take away the fact that the mother he knew is gone.  This is why I have spent a lot of effort trying to make my care not be solely on him as well.  There is just so much that you can give to others before there is none left for yourself.  I know it has been hard for him to not be at every procedure for me but it has been good to have some things taken off his plate.  At least tonight’s dinner was pretty calm without the anger and tears that can come with someone with Alzheimer’s.  She thought she was 60 and I don’t think really believed us on her age.  At least she liked her dinner and flowers.

My cancer story seems so very unimportant when faced with those that do not have a curable cancer.  My scars will fade.  They will only have memories.  My childhood friends (and adult friends too) just said goodbye to a father figure in their life and their mom said goodbye to her best friend.  My heart hurts for the loss you all must be feeling.  His cancer was not curable.  Cancer.  That really shitty thing that comes around and takes those that we love.  Even though it was many years ago, I still remember and feel very intently the feelings I had when cancer took my dad.

My work family has been given so many blows recently.  My dear friend who said goodbye to two brothers and an uncle in a four month time period.  I am honored to have you as part of my team and my friend.  I have another work family member who said goodbye to his mom recently.  I wish there were words other than “I’m Sorry” that would be appropriate.  Again that damn cancer taking someone’s loved one.  Another one recently said goodbye to his father this year.  Another one as a father that has to watch his son get chemo for a year.  The daughter that is watching her father deteriorate every day.  The mom so far away from her daughter that needs her.  The hardest for me to see is the mom who just said goodbye to her only son.  I cannot comprehend your loss.  My heart breaks for what you all are coping with.  Many of you have been a part of my life for the last 15+ years.  My prayers seem so minor but I say them anyway.

This caring bridge entry is for any of you that are suffering in any way.  May God be carrying you through your difficult times and may you find peace as you ride your storm.  May the footprints in the sand be single and you be sheltered in His arms.